Digital Safety for Looked-After Children
Children in care face unique digital challenges shaped by their experiences, their legal status, and the complexity of their relationships. This guide offers trauma-informed, practical approaches to supporting their digital safety and wellbeing.
This is practical educational content to support families. For case-specific concerns about a child's safety, contact the NSPCC helpline on 0808 800 5000 or your local safeguarding team.
Trauma-informed approaches to device supervision
Children who have experienced abuse, neglect, or instability may have a complex relationship with control and surveillance. For a child who has been harmed by adults they trusted, having someone monitor their device can feel threatening rather than protective. Approach device supervision with transparency and sensitivity. Explain clearly what you can see and why — not as a punishment or a lack of trust, but as part of keeping them safe while they settle in. Avoid secret monitoring, which can severely damage the trust you are working to build. Some children in care may have used devices as their only source of comfort, connection, or escape during difficult times. Taking a device away — even temporarily — can trigger a disproportionate response rooted in past experiences of loss. Where restrictions are necessary, implement them gradually and with the child's input wherever possible. Work with the child's social worker to ensure your approach to device supervision is consistent with their care plan.
Managing contact with birth family online
One of the most significant digital safety challenges for looked-after children is unauthorised contact with birth family members through social media, messaging apps, and gaming platforms. A child's contact arrangements are determined by the court or the local authority for good reasons — often related to the child's safety. However, the reality is that social media makes it extremely easy for birth family members to find and contact a child, and for a child to search for their birth family. This is not something that can be entirely prevented through parental controls alone. If your foster child is having unauthorised contact, do not react with anger or punishment. The child's desire to connect with their birth family is natural and understandable, even when the contact itself is unsafe. Report the contact to the child's social worker immediately. Work together to decide on the appropriate response, which may include adjusting privacy settings, reporting accounts to platforms, or revisiting the contact plan. The child needs to understand that the restriction is about their safety, not about being denied love.
Attachment-aware digital parenting
Many looked-after children have insecure or disorganised attachment patterns that affect how they relate to caregivers — and this extends to digital parenting. A child with an avoidant attachment style may resist any involvement in their online life and become hostile when questioned. A child with an anxious attachment style may overshare online, seeking validation and connection from strangers. Understanding these patterns can help you respond more effectively. Rather than imposing rigid rules, focus on building a relationship where the child gradually feels safe enough to involve you in their digital world. Shared activities — watching YouTube together, playing a game together, looking at something they are interested in online — can build connection without feeling intrusive. Be consistent, patient, and prepared for setbacks. A child who shares something with you online one week and refuses to the next is not being difficult — they are testing whether you will remain steady regardless. Consult with the child's therapist or social worker about how their attachment needs should inform your approach to digital boundaries.
Privacy rights of children in care
Children in care have the same right to privacy as any other child, and in some respects their privacy needs are greater. Be extremely careful about sharing photos or information about a looked-after child on social media — even in private groups for foster carers. A seemingly innocent photo can reveal a child's location to someone they are meant to be protected from. Many local authorities have clear policies about this, and breaching them can have serious consequences. The child's digital identity also deserves protection. Avoid creating accounts or profiles for the child that use their placement details, and ensure their real name and location are not visible on any platforms. If the child already has social media accounts, review their privacy settings together to ensure their profile does not reveal their placement. As the child gets older, involve them in decisions about their digital privacy. They have a right to understand who holds information about them and how their image is being used — this is particularly important for children whose life stories have often been shared without their consent.
Supporting transitions
Children in care frequently experience placement moves, changes in school, and transitions to independence — and each of these disrupts their digital life too. When a child moves placement, their device may be their only continuous possession and their only link to previous friendships. Recognise this and handle the transition sensitively. Ensure the child can keep their device and accounts wherever possible, while updating any safety settings that need to change for the new placement. When a young person transitions out of care and into independent living, digital skills and safety awareness become especially important. They may be managing their own finances online for the first time, navigating housing applications, or using dating apps. Leaving care services and personal advisers should include digital safety and digital skills in transition planning. The charity Become (becomecharity.org.uk) provides resources specifically for care leavers, and local authority leaving care teams can signpost to digital skills support.
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