Talking About Catfishing and Fake Online Identities
Help your child understand that people online are not always who they claim to be — covering fake profiles, catfishing, and how to verify identity safely.
Catfishing — creating a fake identity to deceive someone online — is a real risk for young people. Perpetrators may be adults seeking to exploit children, or peers who are curious or malicious. This script helps children develop healthy scepticism about online identities without becoming fearful of all online contact.
When to have this conversation
From age 11, before your child is actively using social media or gaming platforms with chat functions.
Before you start
- • Look up a real example of a catfishing case that was reported in the UK news — having a concrete story can make the conversation feel real rather than abstract.
- • Think of a simple test for verifying identity, such as a video call, that you can discuss together.
- • Keep the tone balanced — most online friendships are genuine, but healthy wariness is important.
Conversation by age group
"Have you ever heard of catfishing? I want to explain what it is and what to do if it ever happens to you."
parent
"Catfishing is when someone pretends to be a different person online. They might use fake photos, a fake name, or pretend to be a different age. The reason is usually to trick someone into trusting them."
child
"Why would someone do that?"
parent
"Sometimes it is harmless — like someone who is shy and uses a different picture. But sometimes it is more serious, like an adult pretending to be a teenager to get close to young people. That is why it is important to be careful."
parent
"If someone you have met online seems really keen to be your friend very quickly, never wants to do a video call, or asks you to keep the friendship secret — those are warning signs. You can always come to me to check."
Frame caution as a normal and sensible response, not as paranoia.
child
"What if I already have a friend online that I have never met?"
parent
"That is fine — lots of people make friends online. The key is to stay cautious until you can verify who they really are. A quick video call is a simple way to check. And never share your address, school name, or any personal details with someone you have only met online."
Tips for this age
- • At this age, children are beginning to form online friendships that feel very real. Validate those friendships while teaching healthy verification habits.
- • Role-play a scenario together: 'What would you do if someone asked you to video call and they kept making excuses?'
"I want to talk about something that is more common online than people realise — and it affects teenagers specifically."
parent
"You have probably heard of catfishing. I want to make sure you know what it looks like when it is actually happening — because in the moment, it can be hard to see."
child
"I would know if someone was fake."
parent
"People who do this are often very good at it. They do research, they mirror your interests, and they build trust slowly. Some people have been communicating with someone for months before realising. It is not a sign of being naive — it is a sign of being human."
parent
"The clearest test is always a live video call. Anyone who consistently avoids showing their real face should raise a question. Trust your gut — if something feels off, it probably is."
Emphasise that gut instinct is valid and should be acted on.
child
"What if I think it is happening but I am not sure?"
parent
"Tell me or another adult you trust. You can also report concerns to CEOP at ceop.police.uk — you do not need to be certain. It is always better to check than to carry on and find out later that something was wrong."
Tips for this age
- • Teenagers at this age may be on dating apps or platforms where catfishing is more prevalent. Be aware of which platforms they use.
- • Discuss the difference between healthy scepticism and unhealthy paranoia — the goal is confident, critical thinking.
Follow-up actions
- → Review privacy settings together on social media to limit what strangers can see about your child.
- → Agree that before meeting anyone from online in person, they will tell you first and take a trusted adult.
Related safety topics
This is practical educational content to support families. For case-specific concerns about a child's safety, contact the NSPCC helpline on 0808 800 5000 or your local safeguarding team.